Saturday, July 13, 2013

Unemployed and so happy - NOT

Technically, I do have a job, but I don't think it really counts... So this is a piece I wrote for someone a short while ago, and it still applies. I'm not going to say any more because I think I say it all in the piece.

So here it is:



I’m 23 years old and I’m sitting at home warming the furniture. I completed my degree in 2011 with a Bachelor of Arts majoring in Journalism & Media Studies and English from Rhodes University.

It’s now 2013, and I have yet to find a job. Okay, technically, I do have a job. But, it’s a part time one. I've been working as a secretary for an accountant since July 2012. It started off as being a three month temporary position while his usual secretary went on maternity leave. She then extended the leave and thereafter I was asked to stay on to just ‘help her ease back into the working process’. As of January this year I am called in for just two weeks a month to help out during the VAT period. All I basically do is pretty much run around the office helping out with odds and ends that the secretary cannot get to… I answer the phone, take messages, and mostly just do filing. Now and then I may get to do something really exciting – data capturing! Most of the time though I have to find work to do or create work for myself. As of May 2013 I now have a 'full time' job as a secretary - EXCITING stuff.

So, yes, I got an expensive piece of paper stating that I have this ‘awesome’ degree to be a secretary’s assistant. Makes me feel real good about myself…

When I first completed my degree, I was nervous about entering the working world. I didn't really know what to expect or if I’d make it… But, I was excited to do so, to have a job. I guess I should have started looking for a job while I was still studying, but I didn't think. So I only started looking for one in January the following year. I thought I’d just look around for a few weeks and be working in no time.

How ignorant I was. Despite knowing all about the high unemployment rates in South Africa and hearing all the stories about how difficult it is to get a job; I thought because I had a degree and that too from Rhodes University (oooooo), that I would get a job with ease.

So I started applying for jobs. I initially started with just writing jobs, then moved on to editing as well as I realized I’d prefer a job as a sub-editor and could keep writing on my own. I applied for jobs in newspapers, and online, for jobs in Pietermaritzburg, Durban, Cape Town, Johannesburg – pretty much anywhere and everywhere. The main problem is, when searching for jobs, most places ask for a minimum of five years’ experience. If they’re not asking for five years, its two… If a job position asked for two years or less experience, I would still apply for it, because I’m that desperate. So I’d just send my CV and in my cover letter I would state that all the vacation work, volunteer work and work at student publications that I’d done during my studies adds up to quite a bit of experience and hope for the best.

The first response that I received was for a junior reporter post at a local newspaper, I was to be called in for an interview, but I had yet to have my licence, which was a must. So that fell through. My mum still goes around telling everyone that I would have had that job if not for the licence issue – it’s her way of feeling better, that it wasn't any fault of mine… If only I had had my licence the job would have been mine, despite the fact that I was just one of many being called in for the interview.

Thereafter I had only being called in for two interviews, and had one interview over the phone. My first interview was at an online motivational publication. I royally messed up the interview. I’m very bad at the verbal and face-to-face interactions, which is why the whole system screws me over even more. If only everything were based from a dark room where no one could see me and I could just be judged on my writing (or editing) I might stand a better chance. But either way, the job wasn't suited to me, I’m not very big on motivational nonsense, life is was it is, the end. The next interview came months later. It was for a junior position as a sub-editor. I really got my hopes up for this. The interview wasn't the greatest, but I thought I managed to stumble through okay… I had to also do an aptitude test and an editing test. I eventually heard back from them over a month later, after I’d already assumed that I hadn't gotten the position. I was politely told that the position was given to someone with more experience, but that they were very impressed with me and my application and I should keep an eye out for any future positions at the company and keep applying. I realized that was all probably utter hogwash that they just tell people to let them off gently.

After these failings I’d just given up. I stopped applying for jobs or even looking. I resigned myself to the fact that I’m just not good enough and that’s that. I’d applied for SO many jobs, and only heard back from a few, and that too to be turned down. Most places didn't even give me a rejection response. I wasn't even good enough to be rejected.

I know that you have to keep trying, you cannot give up. But I've been trying for over a year now and I’m just depressed. When people ask what I’m doing I just jokingly say I’m unemployed or sitting at home or on sabbatical or something, but every time I’m asked that question and forced to face it, I just get depressed. I spend days just crying about it. I think of everyone I know, they've all got awesome jobs and are out there moving on and living their lives, even the people who didn't study! That’s what hurts the most, I studied and cannot get a job, yet someone who barely passed matric is living it up with a top notch job. It’s extremely embarrassing that I still live with my parents and have to rely on my dad for everything. I’m at the age where I should be doing everything for myself and helping out my parents… not living off them.

I keep applying for jobs hoping that THIS will be the one! Finally I’ll get a call back. But, nothing. It’s just me. I’m just not job material. I keep applying, but I have no hope. I've reached the point where I will do anything! If I find any job paying more than my 'part time' 'secretary' job, I’ll take it, whether it’s as a secretary, a PA or a waitress, I’ll do it. What more can I do? 

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